Alison is an executive function coach, teacher, and mom who has a Ph.D. in Educational Administration and Policy. Her research centered on social media and teacher learning. She spent 15 years teaching in public schools. She now spends her time blogging and working with students, parents, and teachers to use technology responsibly and develop kids' executive function skills.
Your child's grades don't define this December
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Happy Friday, Reader! It’s been a while since I’ve written a blog post or put out a Friday Focus newsletter, but after talking to some families who are stressed to the max this week, I decided I couldn’t put this off any longer. If you're watching your child drown in incomplete assignments right now while holiday chaos swirls around you, I want you to take a breath. This is the hardest time of year for students with executive functioning challenges, and what you're seeing isn't a motivation problem—it's a capacity problem. December asks our kids to do the impossible: plan long-term projects while their brains are screaming about winter break, manage multiple competing deadlines during the most distracting month of the year, and somehow keep it together when they're already running on empty. Here's what actually helps: Stop treating all assignments like they matter equally. This week, I want you to do one thing with your child. Pull up their grade book together and look for the "bubble" grades—the 78% that could become a B with one good test, or the 58% that could become passing with two specific assignments. These are your targets. If they have a solid A in English, that class takes a backseat right now. If they're failing Math but it won't matter for graduation requirements this semester, maybe that's not your December hill to die on. This isn't giving up—it's being strategic when energy is limited. One family I worked with was spending two hours every night on Math homework because their daughter enjoyed it and had a 92%. Meanwhile, she was failing History with a 69%. We shifted focus to just three missing History assignments. Within a week, she was passing, her anxiety dropped significantly, and she finally felt like she could breathe. Your child needs to see that the mountain is actually climbable. When everything feels equally urgent, nothing gets done. When you identify what truly matters most, suddenly there's a path forward. This intense period is temporary. You're not building forever systems right now—you're just getting through December. And you don't have to do it perfectly. Quick Win of the Week: Tonight, spend 10 minutes listing every class and current grade. Circle the 2-3 that need attention most. That's it—just identify priorities. You can plan tomorrow. Need help creating that December game plan? I’ve written much more about this topic over on the blog. And if you want to help your child avoid this end-of-semester scramble in future semesters, you may want to schedule a free 30-minute discovery call to learn how we can support your family through coaching, as we’ll have some new spots available in January. You're showing up for your child during their hardest season. That's exactly what they need—not a perfect plan, just you in their corner. How's your child handling the December crunch? Hit reply—I'd love to hear what's working (or what's making you want to hide under the covers). |
Alison Eber, Ph.D.
Alison is an executive function coach, teacher, and mom who has a Ph.D. in Educational Administration and Policy. Her research centered on social media and teacher learning. She spent 15 years teaching in public schools. She now spends her time blogging and working with students, parents, and teachers to use technology responsibly and develop kids' executive function skills.
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